Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) is the most common type of personality disorders. While it may appear to be narcissistic behavior to others, it is not. People with BPD have emotions that run very deep. In fact, their emotions are intense and exaggerated. They will take offense at the slightest comment, even when no offense was meant. In other words, people with BPD are very fragile. BPD causes severe instability in self-image, behavior, mood and personal relationships. This disorder, therefore, gets in the way of every aspect of everyday life, such as work, social relationships and even family life. The reason the word "borderline" is used is because they are thought to be on the border of psychosis and neurosis. 2% of the population suffers with BPD. And, interestingly enough, more women than men suffer from this type of personality disorder. Although, BPD is very treatable, treatment is more successful when it is diagnosed in its early stages, and it must be done by a therapist that specializes in BPD. Going to the wrong type of therapist can actually make a person worse.
As with so many psychological disorders, the brain of someone with BPD is injured. The limbic system is hypersensitive and their amygdala may very well be swollen, making the emotional input that they receive to be exaggerated. This accounts for the major mood swings and their volatile responses when they perceive that they are being abandoned.
Borderline Personality Disorder usually presents itself during adolescence and early adulthood. One of the causes is thought to be genetic, which would mean that they inherit this condition from theeir ancestors, and it is also the result of childhood abuse and/or trauma.
What criteria is necessary for a person to be at risk for developing BPD?
1. If you have a family member with BPD.
2. If you felt emotionally unstable as a child.
3. If you were emotionally and/or physically abused as a child.
4. If you developed a fear of abandonment as a child.
People with BPD suffer from an intense fear of abandonment. In my opinion, this is the most threatening fear they have. Thinking that they are at risk of being abandoned by someone, may trigger volatile behavior. The trigger could even be as insignificant as a reasonable short-term separation. They may feel that this perceived abandonment is because they did something wrong. The reason this fear is so intense is because people with BPD have an intense intolerance to being left alone. They would much rather be with other people. And, this is the reason why, when someone befriends them, they make that person the center of their lives. They tend to idealize them.
However, if they perceive that this friend is going to abandon them, these feelings turn into intense hatred, This can happen for something as simple as the new friend spending time with someone else, without including them. Again, the person with BPD may very well think that they did something wrong and that's why their friend does not want to spend time with him/her. Impulsive, violent, and/or self-destructive behavior is the result of these frightening and intense feelings. Because of this particular fear, they tend to have intense, unstable and difficult relationships.
Other traits are:
1. Very poor self-image.
2. Self-destructive, impulsive behavior.
3. Suicidal threats and attempts which, of course, can be successful.
4. Extreme mood swings.
5. Feeling empty inside, feelings of isolation or being ostracized by humanity.
6. When under severe stress, short-lived psychotic episodes.
7. Self-mutilation.
And, let me touch on self-mutilation.
When cutting themselves, the pain they feel replaces their anguish and emotional pain. When blood starts surfacing and spilling over, they feel a substantial sense of relief. It almost seems to detonate the emotional bomb that is about to explode inside them.
People with BPD feel unworthy of love but, yet, try to look for love from the people around them.
That's why I said above that I feel that fear of abandonment is their number one issue, because love is the bottom line for all of us. The feeling of not being loved alone can be the cause of BPD and so many other psychological conditions. Showing them how to build realistic relationships with trust may be the most important aspect of recovery.
If you or a loved one suffers from BPD it is crucial to get a therapist that specializes in Borderline Personality Disorders.
As with so many psychological disorders, the brain of someone with BPD is injured. The limbic system is hypersensitive and their amygdala may very well be swollen, making the emotional input that they receive to be exaggerated. This accounts for the major mood swings and their volatile responses when they perceive that they are being abandoned.
Borderline Personality Disorder usually presents itself during adolescence and early adulthood. One of the causes is thought to be genetic, which would mean that they inherit this condition from theeir ancestors, and it is also the result of childhood abuse and/or trauma.
What criteria is necessary for a person to be at risk for developing BPD?
1. If you have a family member with BPD.
2. If you felt emotionally unstable as a child.
3. If you were emotionally and/or physically abused as a child.
4. If you developed a fear of abandonment as a child.
People with BPD suffer from an intense fear of abandonment. In my opinion, this is the most threatening fear they have. Thinking that they are at risk of being abandoned by someone, may trigger volatile behavior. The trigger could even be as insignificant as a reasonable short-term separation. They may feel that this perceived abandonment is because they did something wrong. The reason this fear is so intense is because people with BPD have an intense intolerance to being left alone. They would much rather be with other people. And, this is the reason why, when someone befriends them, they make that person the center of their lives. They tend to idealize them.
However, if they perceive that this friend is going to abandon them, these feelings turn into intense hatred, This can happen for something as simple as the new friend spending time with someone else, without including them. Again, the person with BPD may very well think that they did something wrong and that's why their friend does not want to spend time with him/her. Impulsive, violent, and/or self-destructive behavior is the result of these frightening and intense feelings. Because of this particular fear, they tend to have intense, unstable and difficult relationships.
Other traits are:
1. Very poor self-image.
2. Self-destructive, impulsive behavior.
3. Suicidal threats and attempts which, of course, can be successful.
4. Extreme mood swings.
5. Feeling empty inside, feelings of isolation or being ostracized by humanity.
6. When under severe stress, short-lived psychotic episodes.
7. Self-mutilation.
And, let me touch on self-mutilation.
When cutting themselves, the pain they feel replaces their anguish and emotional pain. When blood starts surfacing and spilling over, they feel a substantial sense of relief. It almost seems to detonate the emotional bomb that is about to explode inside them.
People with BPD feel unworthy of love but, yet, try to look for love from the people around them.
That's why I said above that I feel that fear of abandonment is their number one issue, because love is the bottom line for all of us. The feeling of not being loved alone can be the cause of BPD and so many other psychological conditions. Showing them how to build realistic relationships with trust may be the most important aspect of recovery.
If you or a loved one suffers from BPD it is crucial to get a therapist that specializes in Borderline Personality Disorders.
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